Concerto in Paradiso

For a couple of city boys to be out in the outback enjoying nature is quite the ordeal. Forget the mosquitoes, lack of clean water, no internet Wi-fi, or television, the widely alternating bouts of extreme heat and agonizing cold, the sheer difficulty in going to the toilet (especially if it’s a number 2), the immense task of cooking every single meal, all that is secondary. What is really difficult for a couple of guys from the city to cope with in the outback is the sheer silence that nature affords.

It’s deafening. You can hear nothing for miles around, absolutely nothing, other than the sound of your own breathing or sometimes, if you listen really carefully, you can hear your own heartbeat in your chest, telling you “hello, you’re alive.” It kind of creeps me out.

So after awhile when Charlie Jay starts applying war paint on his face and says he is going Kangaroo hunting, or when The Turk stays in the river all day swimming despite numerous warning of crocs, or even when J. Hoover Sinclair says he is going to climb that mountain yonder to see if he can get reception on his BlackBerry you know that the silence is getting to them. I can see some Lord of The Flies scenarios just around the corner from all this and if no one does something fast that’s going to be a certainty, and I don’t want to be Piggy.

However being Johnny Catch, I came prepared. That why, when we were all huddled around the camp fire roasting marshmallows and wallowing in the horrendous silence that is the great outdoors, I pull out my trump card.

The Latest Model iPhone/iPod Speaker Dock. It is effectively a sound entertainment system, simply dock your iPod into it and like magic the silence of the outdoors is transformed into the funkadelic rock of The Doors. Jim Morrison’s voice booms out in the silence of the night like the Lizard King that he is, singing about breaking through to the other side.

The guys prop up in their fold out chairs in surprise; there is a smile of ease on their faces that the music and the filling in of the silence that it affords that puts them to ease. Leaning back, roasting marshmallows, listening to music, we enjoy nature for what it is with a little extra something to ease that transition. With the sheer power of the iPod Docking Station the music covers the landscape in a powerful wave and we get lost in the force of that music.

That is until a couple of dingoes start joining in the chorus, wailing like stricken banshees. That sends us packing for the city pretty fast but the music was great while it lasted.